We constantly get a lot of questions about all our workshops and teachings, so instead of spending hours on the phone or at the computer, answering the same questions over and over again, we made a selection of questions and answers regarding our workshops, including all relevant questions we usually get.
If there is anything more you want to know, that we have missed, or don’t give enough information about on this page, please ask us about it. Send an e-mail to info@cirkuseros.nu, and we will try to answer your questions, to our ability.
What issues are adressed at your workshops?
Our approach is generally very practical, and most of all we will engage in different playful exercices, supported by theory, and talks in open sharings. Our idea is that after a workshop of ours you will bring with you new knowledge, both as facts and questions, and most of all as practical experience.
Most of these subjects are almost always on the menu, in different proportion depending on the theme of the workshop:
- Self-image, and partner-image – how to love yourself completely, body and soul, being able to give and recieve appreciation to and from others.
- Positive communication – how to communicate in a way that creates love and intimacy, rather than distance. Love and relationship dynamics.
- Being present – to experience life fully, here and now. Exercices to practice awareness.
- Liberation from shame – stop being ruled by useless and unnecessary shame, and just enjoy your body – and other people’s bodies.
- The body – how it works – theory and sharing about erogenous zones, orgasm techniques and other bodily functions, in order to experience intimacy in a more powerful way.
- More ways to enjoy – sex is so much more than penetration. Enhance the sensuality and variety of singular and mutual pleasure.
- Integrity and boundries – we all have limits and borders – but where are yours? Have you chosen for yourself? Respect your integrity and others, and break your boundries – the ones you no longer want.
- Breathing – the secret to deepen all life experience – learn easy but powerful techniques to breathe more consciously, more dynamic.
- Sound – the magic release and opening in your body, when you let loose your voice.
- Healing touch – sensuality, intimacy, giving and recieving loving touch.
- Play & laughter – the most efficient road to deep, profound and serious truth.
- Sacred Sexuality – tantric ceremonies, spiritual love-making, affirmations and healing, through breathing, energy work and touch.
Are all your workshops tantra?
Yes and no. If you already are a tantra practitioner, you will recognize quite a few things, and you will find that many of the techniques and attitudes we practice are in fact tantric.
However, since our focus is not the tool, but rather the goal – enhanced life energy, love, presence and pleasure – we don’t label our teching as tantric, and we don’t complicate things with strange sanskrit mantras or advanced and demanding techniques.
Besides, many of the exercises, techniques and theories we practice come from different sources, such as Kama Sutra, Tao, Scandinavian pagan traditions, shamanism, actor’s training as well as modern science and psychology.
As a pedagogical tool we present a series of games and practices, such as communication games, sensitivity games and other forms of practical applications to enhance our ability to be present in our sensual experiences, and to enjoy the pleasures of life to the fullest.
Our goal is not to turn everyone into tantrics. The goal is more happiness, more pleasure, more presence, more life. Therefore we don’t call this a tantra workshop, even if we technically speaking could do so.
How many usually attend your workshops?
This differs a lot depending on many different circumstances. One very important measure is group dynamics. Another is how big the room is. Another, of course, is depending on how many people actually want to come to a workshop. It could be an intimate tantra workshop for couples, with maybe just 12-16 people, or it could be a dynamic group workshop, with a huge group of 60-80 people. Or it could be a small gathering with 6-8 people. Whatever works the best will be what we go for.
How do I apply for a workshop?
Check out the schedule page first, and look up it there will be a workshop at a place and date that fits you.
If you speak and understand Swedish, you should check out our Swedish page Cirkus Eros, because there we offer a large amount of workshops you won’t find on this website, which focuses on our English-speaking workshop participants.
Then you call us, or send an e-mail, tell us a bit about yourself (and your partner, if you are bringing one) – where you come from, your name(s), a phone number and e-mail address. Check out the Contact page, and continue from there.
How much does it cost?
This is very different for each workshop, and depends on many different factors, such as what kind of workshop it is, where it is, for how long time the workshop goes on, if there is food and lodging included, and so many other things. So to find out the price, you start at the schedule page and check the facts for that specific workshop.
How long time does a workshop last?
There are weekend workshops for couples, that start Friday evening and goes on until Sunday afternoon. And we arrange luxurious workshops that goes on for five days to a whole week. And we have shorter workshops – a day, or maybe just a couple of hours at a festival. It differs.
What kind of people attend your workshops?
All kinds of people. CEO:s, librarians, artists, doctors, plummers, therapists, tall, short, young, old, dark, fair, women, men, urban people, country people, people from all over.
What all our workshop participants usually have in common, is an open mind, curiosity, wanting to learn more, wanting to develop as human beings, in relating to oneself and others, and of course a strong urge to grow and develop, emotionally and sexually.
What is the general age at your workshops?
The average age of our workshop attendants is generally 25-55. But we have had younger, and we have had older. In other words, a large age span. Generally though, our workshops tend to attract people with a certain amount of life experience (not the very youngest), and a desire to refine and expand their ability to experience pleasure.
According to the general ideas of our modern, Western society, we have our sexual peak when we are young. But that only counts for physical performance and stamina. According to older Eastern traditions, such as Tao and Tantra, you can become better and better over the years, with accumulated insights and experience, and a refined feeling for giving and recieving. Sexual pleasure can actually get better and better with age, if you want it.
Can I attend if I am menstruating?
Menstruation is not a problem – unless you have a very problematic, painful and fluent menstruation, that knocks you out.
If you become very emotional from your period (such as PMS), that does not need to be a problem either. The basic idea with all our workshops is to create such a warm and safe athmosphere that everyone can feel safe to be themselves, open, vulnerable, emotional and naked, on all levels. That could actually reduce the negative sides of your emotions, radically.
Regarding the activities in the workshop, having a period mustn’t be a problem either. You can participate fully and get your money’s worth. We do not focus on penetrative sex. The only exception to this is in some workshops, where we teach tantric massage, and then we usually also practice stimulation of the G-spot. But if we have this activity as an active part of the workshop, it is a very small part, and can be an exercise as homework, which you can try out at home later, when your period has ended.
We see menstruation as an important and powerful part of being a woman, a part of her sexuality, that should be cherished and respected. Jennie has had her period at several times, teaching a workshop, and that has never been a problem.
Can I participate as a single person?
We offer many different workshops – some of them are couple oriented, and others are not. Couple oriented workshops ar of course for couples. Some workshops focus more on the dynamics within each individual, and with the group. In those workshops both couples and singular persons are equally welcome.
Are we naked during the workshop? Why?
First of all – nothing is ever compulsory at our workshops. Everything is entirely by choice, a 100 % volountary. You only do what you want to do, and you don’t do what you don’t want to do. You set your boundries, out of respect for yourself. Noone forces you to do anything. The whole idea with all our workshops is to enjoy, to expand your pleasure – not to make you feel awkward and uncomfortable.
Most of our workshops are designed featuring “clothing optional” as the base principle, but we have also several workshops in which nudity isn’t necessary at all, and others wherein we strongly recommend nudity. There’s a whole range of that, depending on the focus of the workshop. A lecture doesn’t requier any nudity, but in a massage workshop clothing will simply be in the way.
Remember – nudity is not dangerous. Ever. Noone ever died from being naked, nor did anyone ever die from seeing someone naked. There is nothing strange, dangerous or scary about nudity. Really. Quite the contrary, there are many advantages, including the purely pedagogical, of doing the workshop in the nude.
It’s liberating and pleasant to be naked. It is also practical, since most our workshops to a large extent are focused on the body, about sexuality and physical pleasure, which requires a positive relationship to your own body. And we encourage nudity, joy, pleasure, and being proud of your own body.
Therefore we invite you to practice nudity during a large portion of many of our workshops. First of all to get rid of the shame around the body, opening up to a more positive self-image regarding your body. When we arrange workshops, we always try to find places wherein everyone can feel safe, with no uninvited guests, no onlookers, only workshop participants – so it is perfectly safe to be naked at all times during our workshops – if you want to. And it is perfectly alright to put on clothes again, if you feel the need to do that.
We put a lot of effort into creating a warm, safe and open athmosphere, within the group and in the room. Noone shold ever have to feel awkward or embarrassed about themselves.
Our long-standing experience with nudity in groups is that as soon as you get over two to five minutes of initial shyness, all problems disappear. Who hasn’t ever done skinny-dipping, or sauna bathing with friends? And – doing it all together effectively removes the feeling of shameful exposure. Actually, workshop participants are usually amazed with how relaxed and natural they feel about being naked together. Much more than they would ever have expected.
The only way to grow as a human being is to go where we haven’t been before. That requires some courage. Sometimes more, sometimes less – but the bigger the risk, the bigger the winning. So if nudity scares the shit out of you, there is a lot to gain from challenging yourself to it. It can be extremely energizing and liberating to break those boundries.
Safety – we want to give you the opportunity to experience that incredible safety and comfort that can arise when you let go of all masks, tear down all walls, when we all are truly naked in front of each other – physically, as well as emotionally, intellectually and spiritually.
We engage in many practical exercises during the most of our workshops, such as trying out different techniques of touch and caressing, sensual massage, finding new erogenous zones, breathing exercises, etc. – all in order to enhance the body’s ability to experience pleasure. When we do this it is of course practical to be naked.
There will of course be a lot of theory also, but since the theory may be about erogenous zones, anatomy, the G-spot, sexual positions etc., it is easier to show and observe than keeping it all theoretical. We should remember it’s all about a combination of body and soul.
Each person sets his or her own boundries and limits. If you are very, very shy, you can save some of the exercises to another time, when you are alone, maybe with your partner, in your room. And you can wear something if you need to. But we don’t want to set a too narrow perimeter. All individuals are responsible for themselves, and everyone has their personal habits and preferences.
You decide how far you want to go, at every occasion. And whatever you do with someone else, always has to be consensual. That is a golden rule, never to be broken.
Conclusively, it would be very impractical, counterproductive, and most probably very annoying and unsatisfying, if we all were wearing clothes the whole time. This could actually add to the problem of fear around the body, rather than dissolving it.
Will other participants see me naked?
Yes, as long as we are all naked, as in most of our practical workshops, of course everyone will see each other. Our experience is that when you are busy doing exercises, especially if you are doing them with a partner, you will be too busy to even notice what everyone else are doing. And if you do take a little peek, all you will se is beauty and inspiration – what you see will be a lot of love and pleasure. And it is not really any different from seeing each other in the sauna, or on a nude beach.
Remember – it is not dangerous to be naked! It is not dangerous to be seen naked! No man or woman in history has ever died from seeing another man or woman naked. Remember that!
Will there be sex in the workshop?
This is very much a matter of definition – what is sex? All our workshops has a strong focus on sensuality, sexuality, love and pleasure, so it would seem rather strange if no participants would ever have any sexual activity at all in the workshop room.
So how do we define sex? In our “modern” culture, our thoughts on sex are very fixed on penetration, because of old (christian) ideals wherein sex is only for procreation, and nothing else. And this of course includes the male ejaculation. So when we speak of “sex or not”, we actually speak of only one aspect of sex – intercourse combined with ejaculation. But sex & sexuality is so much more than that, and penetrative sex with male ejaculation is really only absolutely necessary when we want to make babies.
So we don’t expect any participant to have sexual intercourse in the workshop. But of course it is inevitable that we are sexual, sensual and aroused once in a while during a workshop. And we don’t prohibit any expressions of sexuality, as long as it involves totally consenting adults.
A long look, a deep breath, a light touch – can all be intensely erotic. And when we deal with subjects such as erogenous zones, the G-spot and sensual massage, it is of course easier to show and tell, and try it out, technically and practically, rather than just sticking with theory. If that would be the case, we could just all stay at home, reading books about it. And of course, you try whatever it is you want to try, when and how you prefer to.
Caressing and other forms of touch can also be incredibly sensual, without being directly sexual. A feather touch can give strong sensations that are not at all sexual, but delightfully enjoyable just the same.
Again we strongly remind you – sex in itself is NOT dangerous – especially when you are enjoying it with yourself or with someone you know and appreciate. And of course, we recommend safer sex at all times.
Sex is fun, healthy, healing, nourishing, strengthening to love and wholesome in all ways possible. Sex is not dangerous. Not more dangerous than eating, sleeping or breathing. And absolutely nothing to be ashamed about. We especially want to point that out.
We do NOT think that everything has to be sexual. The most important thing is for you to feel balance, harmony and inner peace, that you feel that you are more fluent, open and alive, more playful and loving.
We do think that sex needs to be addressed more seriously. Sex is a very important issue, one of the most important issues, and a lot of people seem to forget this. Precisely because of that, we focus on sex, dwell on it, use the force of sex, liberate it so that we can be in the flow, instead of getting stuck in old fears and prejudice.
In the evaluations we have gotten from our previous workshop participants, it is very clear that most of them want even more practical exercises, which we have taken seriosly. We will keep you occupied… 🙂
We are open to all forms of exercises and activities, as long as it is in line with the overriding goal of our workshops, and as long as noone feels unsafe, abused or awkward in the situation. This is very important, so we prefer to be gentle and soft, first of all out of respect for those workshop participants who are more sensitive or shy.
Again we emphasize that there are no specific demands, either what you “should” do or “may not” do. This is entirely a responsibility of each individual, and each couple. The mood will most probably be very warm and erotic, so there will be opportunity for those who wants to indulge in more explicitly erotic activities. But you will never have to feel that you have to do something you don’t want to do. Ever.
Will participants have orgasms in the workshop?
Yes, it definitely happens that workshop participants have orgasms – all kinds of orgasms, in fact. Breathing orgasms, energy orgasms, genital orgasms, full-body orgasms. And that is perfectly lovely and desirable – even if that may not be the purpose of every exercise. We are totally open for people having orgasms, but it is also equally O.K. not to orgasm. It’s all about free will.
Sometimes we teach genital massage, which includes localizing and stimulating the woman’s G-spot. This will naturally lead to some women having an orgasm – and some men get an orgasm during their lingam massage. But it is not necessary, or even desirable for some. We emphasize strongly as a part of our task, that everyone in the workshop has to feel totally safe, and noone shold ever feel pressure to be more brave and outgoing than he or she desires.
Again – everything that happens in a workshop is entirely up to you, your free will, you feeling safe to explore. We don’t push people. We don’t challenge you. We offer a chance for you to challenge yourself. There are no demands, nothing obligatory. We are all there on our own terms. Everyone who comes to our workshops are different, with different stories, different backgrounds, different programming, different levels of fear and inhibition, different goals. Some participants may be super-advanced nudist-exhibitonist-swingers – and others may be very shy and temperate.
We don’t put values on different attitudes. It’s all O.K. Everyone has to be allowed to be on the level they feel they want to be. It’s a matter of mutual respect and acceptance.
The basic idea of all our workshops is that you will get so much new theory AND practical experience, so that you can continue at home. So go ahead and orgasm if you want – this is after all a love and sex workshop, and we think a lot of people would be very disappointed if we wouldn’t give them the chance to try out new techniques and attitudes, in order to have powerful experiences.
Will there be penetrative sex in the workshop?
In some of our workshops for couples, it may happen, yes. In some workshops we do teach about the wonderful aspects of different sexual positions, so just like in the answer to the previous question, yes, there may be occasions where there is an opportunity for penetrative sex. But it is absolutely not a requirement. However, we would never want to stop people from exploring new techniques and attitudes. It’s all about freedom of choice.
You can get everything you want out of a workshop, regardless of whether you choose to have penetrative sex or not. It’s not central. Everything comes back to the core issue of all our workshops – what do YOU want?
Some workshops goes on for several days, and since everyone is more or less naked during the whole workshop (at least during the workshop sessions), and the athmosphere is very warm, sensual and allowing, the workshop participants generally get much more open and comfortable about themselves than they are used to, often more than ever, which means that most participants become more daring than usual.
We present many different tantric exercises in our workshops, practices that focuses a lot on breathing and energy movements within and between bodies. During such sessions (in our workshops for couples) you will have the opportunity to try out some classical tantric sexual postures, in order to experience how you can use breathing, touch, energy movements, body movements and sound, to expand the sexual experience as a whole.
We have been taught from early childhood that sex is shameful, even sinful and dangerous, something to fear. We have been taught similarly about our bodies, which should be covered up and hidden all the time. These are just ghosts in the brain, programming, stupid ideas that castrate us mentally and emotionally, stopping us from enjoying and flowing as free individuals. Noone ever died from beeing seen having sex, or seeing someone else having sex.
Most of our workshops has a strong emphasis on sex, and therefore we want to give all our workshop participants as many opportunities as possible to explore as many aspects of their sexuality as they want to, without restraints or prohibitions.
Please read some responses we have gotten from previous workshops – that will give you an idea of how people usually react to the philosophy around our workshops.
Sex is not dangerous! Sex is healthy, fun, enjoyable and strengthens the heart. Diseases can be dangerous, which is a reason to practice safe sex. But in workshops for couples, people are generally “fluid-bonded”, which makes any risks absolutely minimal. It’s more dangerous to climb a stair, or take a walk in the street. So go ahead and enjoy.
Will there be group sex?
No, there will be no group sex – definitely not as a workshop feature, anyway (and yes, we get these questions occaisionally). In some workshops there may be a certain amount of sensual group activities, but not what you would generally refer to as group sex.
What workshop participants are doing on their free time is none of our business, though – in your rooms, in the shower, or wherever seems suitable – is entirely up to each and everyone in the group. We don’t have anything against it, it’s just that none of our workshops is about group sex. There are great clubs for that.
All our workshops are planned, with a schedule, which means there is a scheme, an idea of what we are going to explore during a limited timeline. And of course it is all about pleasure, as a way to reach total ecstasy. So of course we will always encourage more sexual and sensual pleasure. So if you find someone you want to play with, and the time for it – go ahead. We will not stop you… 🙂
There will be free time, which you can choose to use any way you like. If you want to rest, take a walk, or have a laugh, or share a shower with some others, soaping each other down – that’s all fine by us. As long as you are having fun, enjoying and experiencing more love – who could complain about it?
How does sexuality and spirituality mix?
Oh, this is a BIG question, with a potentially very long answer. The very fact that this question even has to be asked is of course the result of many centuries of clerical oppression and carnal animosity, crowned with a massive sexual neurosis. All as a method to stay in power over the people.
But to answer shortly, we are absolutely convinced that there is no contradiction between body and soul, and that intense love, combined with total presence, in the sexual meeting with another person, can be a very efficient path to spiritual development – both individually and within a relationship.
In every mystical, spiritual tradition, play and love is regarded as the highest state, the most advanced form of spirituality, and in many, many traditions and cultures, the connection between spirituality and sexuality is absolutely obvious.
One of our central teachings is that laughter and play often is the most efficient path to the deepest form of serious matters.
But we will tell you more about that when you come to the workshop… 🙂
Who are you, and what are your qualifications?
We are Calle & Jennie Rehbinder, and you can read more about us in our personal presentations, on separate pages:
• Carl Johan Rehbinder »
• Jennie Rehbinder »
I want more information!
If you want to ask us more questions, if there is any additional information that you need from us, don’t hesitate to contact us. That’s what we are here for.
e-mail:
info@cirkuseros.nu
Phone:
+46-70-79 76 333 (Cell, Calle)
+46-70-285 10 91 (Cell, Jennie)